I often wonder about the antithetical argument from the atheistic foundation for meaning. The traditional atheist will hold that God is not essential for having meaning in life, because we can make meaning from our experiences. In this sense, they will concede there is no 'ultimate meaning', but ultimate meaning is not necessary for meaning n this life.
The theists will contend there cannot be meaning without ultimate meaning. Sometimes i think this argument is not convincing. The theist, by nature, has an eternal perspective, the atheist, a temporal. Existential meaning is the only thing in the playbook, and is going to be sufficient because it has to be.
It seems as though the topic of meaning needs to be addressed on a different level than the stratosphere of the ultimate.
I was at work this morning and one of the nurses said he needed to find some motivation for doing his work today. My mind started musing about motivation. What must one do the be motivated for action? How long will this motivation last? Is there any evidence or hope that will fund the expenditure of motivation in life? Motivation needs a benefactor; something that will feed it; a payoff. Our motivation could be feelings or the benefit of others or the glory of God.
For the atheist, these experiences and outcomes of our efforts fade. They are fading flowers; beautiful, yet passing nonetheless. It is the transience of results, the illusive denouement of life which takes an awe to the root of motivation.
Motivation needs hope and reason to be.
Is what I am doing today perpetuating my species? I don't think many people wake up with this thought, and if they did I can't see how this could be considered honorable or even valid. Is what I am doing today going to help others and given me a sense of fulfillment? This I can see as being valid and honorable, but far from Darwinian thought processes. But these motivations fall prey to time and chance. All effectual outcomes will soon be forgotten, covered over with grass and sand. The impacted lives will end. The foundations for the sake of charity will profit only bleaching bones.
From the Christian worldview, my actions will echo into eternity. What I do today will matter forever. There is an 'equals' sign at the end of life, and what I do will add up to something.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Truth: The Servant of DNA.
Out of the nothingness. A string of 250 proteins or so, a few amino acids strung together in a cup of water, swirling around, fraternizing, flirting with life. From this single celled organism springs an organism which propagates its own DNA to the next generation. This generation begets, another, begets another. Out random genetic mutation arises phenotypic traits which enhance the organisms chances of survival given the climate, the environment, and the surrounding organisms. This organism flourishes and grows, mutating, surviving, propagating.
It's reason for being, if it were conscious enough to understand, would be to continue this dance with DNA throughout the millennia, focusing all of its non-conscious efforts on surviving the winter and passing on its genes to the next generation.
Other species interact with it and it either fights of flies, depending on whatever will continue its survival, or perhaps, it will coexists symbiotically, sensing the mutual benefits of such a relationship. The organism grows in complexity through the eons, developing sensing organs, more intricate reproduction, an Olympic gene pool, and one day it becomes conscious of itself: that it exists. It congregates into community and herds for protection.
Strong instinctual drives crystallize into emotional categories which dictate actions.
Herds of creatures develop corporate norms which function to increase the propagation of the species and satisfy the evolution-generated need of comfort and freedom from anxiety. These creatures evolve to semi-transcendence, to be able to ponder their place int he universe. Born out of instinctual drives is the need to understand the surrounding world, to discover its origins and its destiny. They develop a common framework of social interactions and order to survive as a species, to relay their DNA to the next generation. They talk of things like "truth" and "absolutes" and beliefs of origins coalesce into worldviews.
But the even paced pulse throughout all of time is the incessant staccato drum beat of propagation, unchanging in its rhythm or tone. Since when did this life become something more? Are not all of our attempts to superimpose meaning or truth over this monochromatic tapestry a mere churlish pretense? And what does this say of our beliefs in our origins, or in our sciences or our observations about the world? What rubric are we to use to understand these if not the rubric of propagation? All that matters is this, not truth, not science, not religion or love. They only matter as accompanying dissonance to the metronome of propagation.
Naturalistic evolution shoots itself in the foot; indeed the very belief is built on a foundation that betrays all that is built on it. The purpose of our faculties is to promote survival and so we ought to assume any conclusion these faculties bring us to are to work to that end. Even our belief that science could lead us to the truth, or that there is a truth at all. This insidious presence lies like carrion in the heart of evolution. Rotting.
the meaning of life, as I can see it from this, is to propagate. So it doesn't so much matter what the truth is or what i believe: this has no ultimate meaning, only to the end it helps my species continue on meandering down the road of existence, albeit a bleak and ultimately pointless one that most likely will dead end at the death of our sun. What I know to be the truth might as well be some phrase by the Caterpillar,
'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe",
so long as it serves the end of my species continuing.
Truth is the servant of DNA.
It's reason for being, if it were conscious enough to understand, would be to continue this dance with DNA throughout the millennia, focusing all of its non-conscious efforts on surviving the winter and passing on its genes to the next generation.
Other species interact with it and it either fights of flies, depending on whatever will continue its survival, or perhaps, it will coexists symbiotically, sensing the mutual benefits of such a relationship. The organism grows in complexity through the eons, developing sensing organs, more intricate reproduction, an Olympic gene pool, and one day it becomes conscious of itself: that it exists. It congregates into community and herds for protection.
Strong instinctual drives crystallize into emotional categories which dictate actions.
Herds of creatures develop corporate norms which function to increase the propagation of the species and satisfy the evolution-generated need of comfort and freedom from anxiety. These creatures evolve to semi-transcendence, to be able to ponder their place int he universe. Born out of instinctual drives is the need to understand the surrounding world, to discover its origins and its destiny. They develop a common framework of social interactions and order to survive as a species, to relay their DNA to the next generation. They talk of things like "truth" and "absolutes" and beliefs of origins coalesce into worldviews.
But the even paced pulse throughout all of time is the incessant staccato drum beat of propagation, unchanging in its rhythm or tone. Since when did this life become something more? Are not all of our attempts to superimpose meaning or truth over this monochromatic tapestry a mere churlish pretense? And what does this say of our beliefs in our origins, or in our sciences or our observations about the world? What rubric are we to use to understand these if not the rubric of propagation? All that matters is this, not truth, not science, not religion or love. They only matter as accompanying dissonance to the metronome of propagation.
Naturalistic evolution shoots itself in the foot; indeed the very belief is built on a foundation that betrays all that is built on it. The purpose of our faculties is to promote survival and so we ought to assume any conclusion these faculties bring us to are to work to that end. Even our belief that science could lead us to the truth, or that there is a truth at all. This insidious presence lies like carrion in the heart of evolution. Rotting.
the meaning of life, as I can see it from this, is to propagate. So it doesn't so much matter what the truth is or what i believe: this has no ultimate meaning, only to the end it helps my species continue on meandering down the road of existence, albeit a bleak and ultimately pointless one that most likely will dead end at the death of our sun. What I know to be the truth might as well be some phrase by the Caterpillar,
'Twas brillig, and the slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe",
so long as it serves the end of my species continuing.
Truth is the servant of DNA.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Cancer and my offense
Cancer is an incredibly complex and intruiging disease. In order for cancer to begin it's coup of the body, a few things must happen for it to break free of the normal controls and regulations of the body. First, the cells must become immortal. Normal cells have telomere caps which slowly erode as the cell proliferates and when these caps are gone, the cell dies. Programmed death. Cancer cells find a way to rebuild these telomere caps and can continue to proliferate their mutated genes to an infinite number of daughter cells. They also learn not only to shut off anti-growth signals, but also to promote pro-growth signals and division so not only do they live "forever" but they proliferate more quickly and outgrow the surrounding healthy cells. In this way, the cancer begins to alter the tissue and normal functioning of the organ. As the tumor grows, the blood demands increase, so in order to continue it's seige it must obtain a blood supply. So it secretes hormones and signals which attract blood vessel growth to feed itself. It is now fully independent of the body. It has become an anomoly, an aberration of nature. It has erected a kingdom of its own altogether independent of the controls and natural functioning of the body. The cancer rejects the normal functioning for which it was made. The result is a mass of undifferentiated cells, destructive, unusable and altogether alien from their original purpose.
We are all born sick. Bodily alive, spiritually breathless. There is a cancer within us from birth, which is the root of all manifestations of evil. Anger, lust, pride, impatience, cruetly, selfishness, unkindness - these the Bible calls 'sins'; the cancer is called Sin. Just as a cancer has syptoms, so Sin has sins which errupt in avulsions and blisters on the character. These syptoms seems to vary form person to person and it is by these syptoms that we compare ourselves to establish ourselves in the moral food chain. Hitler, of course, is at the bottom and traditionally someone like Mother Theresa is at the top. Oddly enough, the symptoms don't seem to correlate with the worldview in any diagnostic manner: you get some atheists who have less symptoms than some christians, but there are some agnostics who are seeminlgy healthier by far than some Muslims, and I am not as symptomless as so and so, but I am far less sickly than... Most of us are perfectly content with the middle ground. Though this cancer manifests in ten thousand ways, in its essence it pulses the same throughout humanity: it hates God, usurps the throne and places the self in His stead. It's proper name is Pride, the great and first sin from which all other sins branch.
There are obvious syptoms which offer no pretenses in its offensive behavior, lewdness and the like; the wanton foolishness of frivilous declaration of independence from the God who continues to bless him. Then there are the more insidious symptoms which manifest in ways such as religion, good-deed-doing, piety. The people with these syomtoms are found hiding in the pews of all kinds of faiths, singing their hyms, sitting on committees, preaching at the pulpit... These people know the easiest way to not need a doctor is to not have nasty syptoms like the other immoral caste. And so, they work to have a right standing with God on their own terms, a shiny badge of approval wrought with their own efforts, tipping the scales until God is in their debt. What they don't realize is the proclivity to earn a rightousness of their own is, in fact, a symptom of the cancer itself. Any suggestions that they are really cancerous when their syomtpoms are so mild, is offensive. I was/am of this stock, and so I am offended by the gospel. I don't like being told I'm sick and am powerless to heal myself; it challenges my pride.
But, the divine medical diagnosis is cancer for all. For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. For we suppress the truth of God in our ungodliness, we do not thank Him or honor Him as God and we worship the creation rather than the Creator - thats how the bible puts it. The prognosis of this cancer is unequivocal and undifferentiated: death.
All those who here this prognosis of the Doctor and believe him, go to the hospital to be healed. The cancer itself is healed instantly and removed, but the body has accostomed to years of living with the symptoms, and habits, behaviors and compensations have furrowed deeply into well trodden patterns. Outsiders looking into the hospital, still unaware of their illness, can be appalled by the syptoms they still see manifested by those within and questions the claim that they are really cured. But they are in a hospital after all, and they are there to heal. But this healing lasts a lifetime as the inferm continues to steadily gaze on and obey the doctor; submitting to his treatments and surrendering to His care.
The means to the cure of the cancer, or Sin as I will refer to it from here, is unique. God, holy and just, has some options but is bound by his character. He can vindicate His name and the denegration of his glory by punising the sin or he can find a substitute for the punishment and buy us out of our death sentence. But there can be no silly talk of 'just forgiving people' like he is giving out candy. There has been real offense and it really has to be dealth with. Anything less would make God guilty of abetting the criminal in the denegration of His infinite worth. There needs to be a righeousness within us, but not attained by means of our own efforts, for they are all tainted with the cancer and therefore are rottennes to him. In the bible, God equates our 'righteous works' to bloody menstration rags (literally). This is how unworthy our efforts are. They are unworthy because they all have their root in the cancer, in pride and self exaltation.
So God, intending to show his infinite mercy to us in our dead and precarious state, set out to save us from his wrath. He loved the world and demonstrates His love to us by giving us, for free, the righteousness we could not earn. And he gives it to us by the only means that accords with grace (or free gift): faith. Faith, by definition, looks away from the self to receive. Eternal life will be received for free or we will get none of it. In God's economy, it is essential that everything be free, lest God become a debtor of man and owe him something. God owes no man anything. Also, just as the nature of a spring is to overflow, so it is the nature of God's infinite love and grace to pour out onto those whom He loves. This is also very good news because we are paupers, spiritually bankrupt, and have no means to reconcile ourselves. Hence the greek word "evangelion" which translates to be "good news".
But the righteousness that God gives is not groundless; He does not whimsically give it; it must be paid for. And He paid for it with the blood of His precious Son Jesus. Jesus lived a perfect life and upheld the glory of God. And so what God does is he swaps our lives. He imputes the perfect life of Christ on to me and gives Christ my tumorous, God-hating, prideful, symptomatic life. Then that sin is dealt with in Jesus. So when God looks at a believer,though still sypmtomatic, he sees the fullness of His perfect Son. Likewise, God saw the wicked unbeliever "in Jesus" as He carried out the death sentence. The sin was really dealt with, someone really died - and died in my stead. I ought to have been on that cross bearing the weight of my own sin and been seperated from God for ever. But Jesus swapped lives with me. Not only am I forgiven because my debt has been paid (forgiveness) but God has given to me all the rightousness of Jesus (justification). A prisoner aquitted of his crime can leave prison but has no friends, money or home. God aquits the sinner and then gives him the estate, the faimly and life of Jesus. And makes him an heir to all the inheritance of God. This is available to all who believe.
This is precious to me and I believe it with all of my being.
To close, I wanted to clarify why the gospel offends me. I am a pretty capable person and I don't like being told I am not good enough and my efforts are vain. I don't like there being a God to whom i am acountable and I don't like not being able to make God my debtor by my good works. Its odd that on the one hand I don't want to believe what I believe to be true, yet am compelled to believe because I see it as the truth. As a person who has had the cancer removed, I still have many symptoms engrained in my behavior. The gospel offends me, because its not about me. I want my own kingdom, my own blood supply, my own life. But it is God's kingdom, Christs' blood and Life of the Spirit.
We are all born sick. Bodily alive, spiritually breathless. There is a cancer within us from birth, which is the root of all manifestations of evil. Anger, lust, pride, impatience, cruetly, selfishness, unkindness - these the Bible calls 'sins'; the cancer is called Sin. Just as a cancer has syptoms, so Sin has sins which errupt in avulsions and blisters on the character. These syptoms seems to vary form person to person and it is by these syptoms that we compare ourselves to establish ourselves in the moral food chain. Hitler, of course, is at the bottom and traditionally someone like Mother Theresa is at the top. Oddly enough, the symptoms don't seem to correlate with the worldview in any diagnostic manner: you get some atheists who have less symptoms than some christians, but there are some agnostics who are seeminlgy healthier by far than some Muslims, and I am not as symptomless as so and so, but I am far less sickly than... Most of us are perfectly content with the middle ground. Though this cancer manifests in ten thousand ways, in its essence it pulses the same throughout humanity: it hates God, usurps the throne and places the self in His stead. It's proper name is Pride, the great and first sin from which all other sins branch.
There are obvious syptoms which offer no pretenses in its offensive behavior, lewdness and the like; the wanton foolishness of frivilous declaration of independence from the God who continues to bless him. Then there are the more insidious symptoms which manifest in ways such as religion, good-deed-doing, piety. The people with these syomtoms are found hiding in the pews of all kinds of faiths, singing their hyms, sitting on committees, preaching at the pulpit... These people know the easiest way to not need a doctor is to not have nasty syptoms like the other immoral caste. And so, they work to have a right standing with God on their own terms, a shiny badge of approval wrought with their own efforts, tipping the scales until God is in their debt. What they don't realize is the proclivity to earn a rightousness of their own is, in fact, a symptom of the cancer itself. Any suggestions that they are really cancerous when their syomtpoms are so mild, is offensive. I was/am of this stock, and so I am offended by the gospel. I don't like being told I'm sick and am powerless to heal myself; it challenges my pride.
But, the divine medical diagnosis is cancer for all. For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. For we suppress the truth of God in our ungodliness, we do not thank Him or honor Him as God and we worship the creation rather than the Creator - thats how the bible puts it. The prognosis of this cancer is unequivocal and undifferentiated: death.
All those who here this prognosis of the Doctor and believe him, go to the hospital to be healed. The cancer itself is healed instantly and removed, but the body has accostomed to years of living with the symptoms, and habits, behaviors and compensations have furrowed deeply into well trodden patterns. Outsiders looking into the hospital, still unaware of their illness, can be appalled by the syptoms they still see manifested by those within and questions the claim that they are really cured. But they are in a hospital after all, and they are there to heal. But this healing lasts a lifetime as the inferm continues to steadily gaze on and obey the doctor; submitting to his treatments and surrendering to His care.
The means to the cure of the cancer, or Sin as I will refer to it from here, is unique. God, holy and just, has some options but is bound by his character. He can vindicate His name and the denegration of his glory by punising the sin or he can find a substitute for the punishment and buy us out of our death sentence. But there can be no silly talk of 'just forgiving people' like he is giving out candy. There has been real offense and it really has to be dealth with. Anything less would make God guilty of abetting the criminal in the denegration of His infinite worth. There needs to be a righeousness within us, but not attained by means of our own efforts, for they are all tainted with the cancer and therefore are rottennes to him. In the bible, God equates our 'righteous works' to bloody menstration rags (literally). This is how unworthy our efforts are. They are unworthy because they all have their root in the cancer, in pride and self exaltation.
So God, intending to show his infinite mercy to us in our dead and precarious state, set out to save us from his wrath. He loved the world and demonstrates His love to us by giving us, for free, the righteousness we could not earn. And he gives it to us by the only means that accords with grace (or free gift): faith. Faith, by definition, looks away from the self to receive. Eternal life will be received for free or we will get none of it. In God's economy, it is essential that everything be free, lest God become a debtor of man and owe him something. God owes no man anything. Also, just as the nature of a spring is to overflow, so it is the nature of God's infinite love and grace to pour out onto those whom He loves. This is also very good news because we are paupers, spiritually bankrupt, and have no means to reconcile ourselves. Hence the greek word "evangelion" which translates to be "good news".
But the righteousness that God gives is not groundless; He does not whimsically give it; it must be paid for. And He paid for it with the blood of His precious Son Jesus. Jesus lived a perfect life and upheld the glory of God. And so what God does is he swaps our lives. He imputes the perfect life of Christ on to me and gives Christ my tumorous, God-hating, prideful, symptomatic life. Then that sin is dealt with in Jesus. So when God looks at a believer,though still sypmtomatic, he sees the fullness of His perfect Son. Likewise, God saw the wicked unbeliever "in Jesus" as He carried out the death sentence. The sin was really dealt with, someone really died - and died in my stead. I ought to have been on that cross bearing the weight of my own sin and been seperated from God for ever. But Jesus swapped lives with me. Not only am I forgiven because my debt has been paid (forgiveness) but God has given to me all the rightousness of Jesus (justification). A prisoner aquitted of his crime can leave prison but has no friends, money or home. God aquits the sinner and then gives him the estate, the faimly and life of Jesus. And makes him an heir to all the inheritance of God. This is available to all who believe.
This is precious to me and I believe it with all of my being.
To close, I wanted to clarify why the gospel offends me. I am a pretty capable person and I don't like being told I am not good enough and my efforts are vain. I don't like there being a God to whom i am acountable and I don't like not being able to make God my debtor by my good works. Its odd that on the one hand I don't want to believe what I believe to be true, yet am compelled to believe because I see it as the truth. As a person who has had the cancer removed, I still have many symptoms engrained in my behavior. The gospel offends me, because its not about me. I want my own kingdom, my own blood supply, my own life. But it is God's kingdom, Christs' blood and Life of the Spirit.
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Get thee hence
And there was war in heaven. Michael and his angels fought against the dragon, and the dragon and his angels fought back. 8But he was not strong enough, and they lost their place in heaven. 9The great dragon was hurled down—that ancient serpent called the devil, or Satan, who leads the whole world astray. He was hurled to the earth, and his angels with him.
10Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say:
“Now have come the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God,
and the authority of his Christ.
For the accuser of our brothers,
who accuses them before our God day and night,
has been hurled down.
11They overcame him
by the blood of the Lamb
and by the word of their testimony;
they did not love their lives so much
as to shrink from death.
10Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say:
“Now have come the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God,
and the authority of his Christ.
For the accuser of our brothers,
who accuses them before our God day and night,
has been hurled down.
11They overcame him
by the blood of the Lamb
and by the word of their testimony;
they did not love their lives so much
as to shrink from death.
Revelation 12: 7-11
When was the Great Dragon hurled down and why? Although I had originally understood this imagery to describe the fall of Satan from heaven after He tried to usurp God's throne, this is not what John is referring to.
Satan is the accuser of the brethren, and he stood before God to bring judgments of death upon the sons of God. The master Prosecutor would evidence time after time of our desert of death to the Judge of the universe; for he is a murderer and lusts ofter our ruin. And the Judge would tolerate this because all that the Prosecutor said was true of man. Then the Prosecutor, out stepping his bounds, would impugn the Eternal God and blaspheme His justice by allowing His glory to be thus treated with such contempt. "What taste hast Thou for the blood of kine, Lord of Eternity, that Thou would demand such cheap recompense for loathsome exchange of Thy Glory? Hast thou no vigor for that which is Thine own and most precious to Thee? Thy leniency for the sins of men casts a long shadow on Thy lavish train. Shall the Name of Heaven be so Shamed as to permit stains into his most holy court?" And so it went, day and night.
Then came the cross. God justified His Name and upheld the honor of His glory through the death of His perfect Son and the myriad sins of man were quenched by blood and forgotten in the deluge of Divine Grace. And so, as the Accuser entered once again into the presence of God to bring his testimony against the elect, he found the blood of the Righteous sprinkled upon the altar of the Most High and a bowl of crimson redemption. "Get thee hence, snake!" the Lord commanded the Prosecutor, "for one has risen up from the midst of the Throne, from the bottomless counsels of the Eternal Godhead, One like a slaughtered lamb, who alone can break the seals, has vindicated my Name and purchased them back to Me." Never again will thy vile invections be tolerated against My elect, for My Love has won them, and My eternal Grace has swallowed up their offences, and they will outlive thee. On the grounds of the Blood of My Lamb, they will overcome thy condemnation. Get thee hence."
And Satan was thrown like lightning from Heaven, where he prowls like a lion, waging war on God's elect for a time. His words have power of suggestion only, but his deception is kind. Still he condemns, but we will overcome him by the blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimony.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Sums
I was thinking the other day as I was doing a sum on my Ti-86 calculator from high school (remember how you could hide answers under the 'program' options???). I don't remember what I was adding but it was something like 86+98+34. I forgot to put in the '=' sign and hit 'enter' and it alerted me to an error. The sum doesn't work without the 'equals' sign.
It got me thinking that all the '+' signs didn't mean anything if there was no '=' sign. The point being, if there is no reckoning of all our '+' and '-'s in life, then they really mean nothing; they lose their value because it is precisely the reckoning that gives them value. No analogy is perfect, but I saw some truth in it. That is one reason why I personally can't espouse the atheistic worldview.
It got me thinking that all the '+' signs didn't mean anything if there was no '=' sign. The point being, if there is no reckoning of all our '+' and '-'s in life, then they really mean nothing; they lose their value because it is precisely the reckoning that gives them value. No analogy is perfect, but I saw some truth in it. That is one reason why I personally can't espouse the atheistic worldview.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
The Death of Illusions
It hard sometimes when old beliefs that have such a deep root in your understanding of the world are revealed to be bogus. It often happens that way with the Lord, I think. We assume Him to be one way, then we are offended when He doesn't act as the script says. He is a God defined by absolute freedom. The Lord does whatever He pleases in all of heaven and earth.
I'm sure to have many of these in the years to come. Thus is the life of a disciplined son of God.
Saturday, July 25, 2009
Galatians study
How do we reverse the Gospel in our society? It is very easy to feel unaceptable to God if our feelings are not in line wit the truth. I try to evoke feelings toward Christ because strong feelings = strong faith = salvation. However, it is not the level, but the object of our faith that saves us. Object has nothing to do with levels.
Friday, July 17, 2009
Mercy, not sacrifice
When God asks for a record of your mercy at the judgment day, he will not be asking for a punched time card. You won't say, "Here it is. Eight hours of mercy. Now where's my wage?"
Instead, God will be asking for your medical charts. You will hand them to him in all lowliness and meekness, and there he will read the evidences of how you trusted him as your divine Physician, and how the medicine of his Word and the therapy of his Spirit took effect in your life because you relied on them to heal you of your unmerciful disposition. And when he sees the evidence of your faith and his healing, he will complete your healing and welcome you into the kingdom forever. Therefore, "Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy."
- John Piper
The opposite of mercy is religious triviality. How do we know what color of paint Mercy demands ona canvas? We are not required to know what to apply in every situation or have a paint by number diagram, but to be merciful people. Merciful people are broken.
Mercy comes from a heart that has first felt its spiritual bankruptcy, and has come to grief over its sin, and has learned to wait meekly for the timing of the Lord, and to cry out in hunger for the work of his mercy to satisfy us with the righteousness we need.
The mercy that God blesses is itself the blessing of God. It grows up like fruit in a broken heart and a meek spirit and a soul that hungers and thirsts for God to be merciful. Mercy comes from mercy. Our mercy to each other comes from God's mercy to us.
The key to becoming a merciful person is to become a broken person. You get the power to show mercy from the real feeling in your heart that you owe everything you are and have to sheer divine mercy. Therefore, if we want to become merciful people, it is imperative that we cultivate a view of God and ourselves that helps us to say with all our heart that every joy and virtue and distress of our lives is owing to the free and undeserved mercy of God.
-JP... again.
Instead, God will be asking for your medical charts. You will hand them to him in all lowliness and meekness, and there he will read the evidences of how you trusted him as your divine Physician, and how the medicine of his Word and the therapy of his Spirit took effect in your life because you relied on them to heal you of your unmerciful disposition. And when he sees the evidence of your faith and his healing, he will complete your healing and welcome you into the kingdom forever. Therefore, "Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy."
- John Piper
The opposite of mercy is religious triviality. How do we know what color of paint Mercy demands ona canvas? We are not required to know what to apply in every situation or have a paint by number diagram, but to be merciful people. Merciful people are broken.
Mercy comes from a heart that has first felt its spiritual bankruptcy, and has come to grief over its sin, and has learned to wait meekly for the timing of the Lord, and to cry out in hunger for the work of his mercy to satisfy us with the righteousness we need.
The mercy that God blesses is itself the blessing of God. It grows up like fruit in a broken heart and a meek spirit and a soul that hungers and thirsts for God to be merciful. Mercy comes from mercy. Our mercy to each other comes from God's mercy to us.
The key to becoming a merciful person is to become a broken person. You get the power to show mercy from the real feeling in your heart that you owe everything you are and have to sheer divine mercy. Therefore, if we want to become merciful people, it is imperative that we cultivate a view of God and ourselves that helps us to say with all our heart that every joy and virtue and distress of our lives is owing to the free and undeserved mercy of God.
-JP... again.
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Godly sorrow
2 Corinthians 7:11 "See what this godly sorrow has produced in you: what earnestness, what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what alarm, what longing, what concern, what readiness to see justice done..."
I went upstairs to discipline Wyatt for getting out of bed today. We sat down and I told him what he did wrong and asked him what happens when he disobeys Daddy. "Get a spankin'" he replies. So I disciplined him, gave him a big hug and remembered at that moment something Mitch had said about when disciplining is done, it is done. Hugs and kisses and happiness because things have been righted. So I did that, put him back to bed and went downstairs.
I told Amber that we should do this after every time he is disciplined. See, it happens so much, particularly with bedtimes, that I spank him and hug him afterwards, but with the attitude of expectancy of him disobeying promptly when I leave. So I leave the room with this "I'll be back..." sort of exit.
Then the revelation alit: When I sin, I hold it over my head - therefore, I hold it over my sons head.
Oh Jesus, how I have lived in unbelief of the gospel and therefore misrepresented the gospel to my son. How dishonoring to the Lord and Who He is? This revelation is still heavy on me and I am sorrowful in my heart both that I have flavored the soup in this bitter salt.
May this godly sorrow work in me what the verse says. The alarm that this revelation has brought about how I have misrepresented the Gospel, May I be diligent to make sure this attitude is dealt with and a readiness to make things right. The diligence to make sure my soul doesn't run to this Iron Maiden of repentance.
Thank you God. I am sorrowful about this. Would you restore the years of my destruction? Would you teach me to rejoice in the grace of Christ, rather than wallow in the mire? Come and revive me, not for me, but for Your Name. Teach me a new way.
I went upstairs to discipline Wyatt for getting out of bed today. We sat down and I told him what he did wrong and asked him what happens when he disobeys Daddy. "Get a spankin'" he replies. So I disciplined him, gave him a big hug and remembered at that moment something Mitch had said about when disciplining is done, it is done. Hugs and kisses and happiness because things have been righted. So I did that, put him back to bed and went downstairs.
I told Amber that we should do this after every time he is disciplined. See, it happens so much, particularly with bedtimes, that I spank him and hug him afterwards, but with the attitude of expectancy of him disobeying promptly when I leave. So I leave the room with this "I'll be back..." sort of exit.
Then the revelation alit: When I sin, I hold it over my head - therefore, I hold it over my sons head.
Oh Jesus, how I have lived in unbelief of the gospel and therefore misrepresented the gospel to my son. How dishonoring to the Lord and Who He is? This revelation is still heavy on me and I am sorrowful in my heart both that I have flavored the soup in this bitter salt.
May this godly sorrow work in me what the verse says. The alarm that this revelation has brought about how I have misrepresented the Gospel, May I be diligent to make sure this attitude is dealt with and a readiness to make things right. The diligence to make sure my soul doesn't run to this Iron Maiden of repentance.
Thank you God. I am sorrowful about this. Would you restore the years of my destruction? Would you teach me to rejoice in the grace of Christ, rather than wallow in the mire? Come and revive me, not for me, but for Your Name. Teach me a new way.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
God of Jesus Christ
Blaise Pascal:
"Year of grace 1654, Monday 23 November, feast of St. Clement . . . from about half past ten at night to about half an hour after midnight, FIRE. God of Abraham, God of Isaac, God of Jacob, not of philosophers and scholars. Certitude, heartfelt joy, peace. God of Jesus Christ. God of Jesus Christ. "My God and your God." . . . Joy, Joy, Joy, tears of joy. . . Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ. May I never be separated from him.
He wrote this down on a piece of parchment and sewed into his coat where it was found after his death eight years later.
"Year of grace 1654, Monday 23 November, feast of St. Clement . . . from about half past ten at night to about half an hour after midnight, FIRE. God of Abraham, God of Isaac, God of Jacob, not of philosophers and scholars. Certitude, heartfelt joy, peace. God of Jesus Christ. God of Jesus Christ. "My God and your God." . . . Joy, Joy, Joy, tears of joy. . . Jesus Christ. Jesus Christ. May I never be separated from him.
He wrote this down on a piece of parchment and sewed into his coat where it was found after his death eight years later.
Waiting
Psalm 25:5 "Lead me in your truth and teach me, for You are the God of my salvation; on You I wait all day."
Events of the past few weeks have left me thirsty. School, absence from the family, discipline issues with Wyatt, not seeing my beautiful wife's smile nearly enough. It's been pretty emotional, particularly with Wyatt. Always wondering if I am winning his heart or wounding it. But I have racked my brain and I cannot think of any other ways to win him to me. It's crippling. I feel like I have been left an invalid.
In these times my normal patterns of dealing have been woefully ineffective for anything. Entertainment, checking out, my own will - they have no answers, no sustenance. They are a chewing on the tongue.
The Lord brought me to Psalm 25. David asks God to show him His ways and teach him. Therefore he waits.
Waiting comes before teaching and leading in the way of truth. So often in a heart of mistrust, a man will become impatient, doubtful and arrogant and go off in the direction of his own understanding. He does not trust in God's way; he feels he will be found wanting in Gods way, therefore he defects.
A man that waits is broken and needy; knowing the uncleanness of his leprous heart and the deficiency of his will and understanding. It seems as though God will thwart us until we sit and wait with a heart that has no other place to go and is looking for Him.
Then, after a period of waiting and Gods establishing our ear to His tender voice, He will lead us in the way of truth.
And all the paths of the Lord are mercy and truth to those who love Him.
Be still my soul and wait on Him. Those who wait on Him will not be put to shame.
Events of the past few weeks have left me thirsty. School, absence from the family, discipline issues with Wyatt, not seeing my beautiful wife's smile nearly enough. It's been pretty emotional, particularly with Wyatt. Always wondering if I am winning his heart or wounding it. But I have racked my brain and I cannot think of any other ways to win him to me. It's crippling. I feel like I have been left an invalid.
In these times my normal patterns of dealing have been woefully ineffective for anything. Entertainment, checking out, my own will - they have no answers, no sustenance. They are a chewing on the tongue.
The Lord brought me to Psalm 25. David asks God to show him His ways and teach him. Therefore he waits.
Waiting comes before teaching and leading in the way of truth. So often in a heart of mistrust, a man will become impatient, doubtful and arrogant and go off in the direction of his own understanding. He does not trust in God's way; he feels he will be found wanting in Gods way, therefore he defects.
A man that waits is broken and needy; knowing the uncleanness of his leprous heart and the deficiency of his will and understanding. It seems as though God will thwart us until we sit and wait with a heart that has no other place to go and is looking for Him.
Then, after a period of waiting and Gods establishing our ear to His tender voice, He will lead us in the way of truth.
And all the paths of the Lord are mercy and truth to those who love Him.
Be still my soul and wait on Him. Those who wait on Him will not be put to shame.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Kill your TV
I have never regretted one minute I have spent praying, reading the Word, or discussing Jesus with a friend. I almost always regret the waste of time, meaninglessness and the trivializing of life I see in watching TV or movies. But here is the idiot part: for some reason I still choose TV so often over Christ.
There have been several occasions that I have settled in my mind to get rid of our TV and dvd player, but have not yet done it. Many times, much to my wife's chagrin (hi amber, you are the only one who reads this anyway...) I get on a soap box and berate entertainment...then I flip it over and use the soap box as a TV stand.
Maybe one day my happy beans will sprout enough to actually get rid of it. Always a battle. How much time have I wasted? How strong could my worshipping muscle be if I spent that time on meaningful things?
Spending time watching TV is like having a constant flow of cash all day long and using that cash to purchase novelties, gag gifts and jelly beans (basically shoppning at Spencer's Gifts) and thinking it is the most amazing purchase at the moment. Then you get home and realize you spent that money on plastic crap which is totally worthless. But then what do we do? We take them out and show them to our most intimate friends, like these things are the highlights of our existence. Wind 'em up and sit around with your best buds talking about 'Bag O Farts' and whatever else kind of worthless crap we picked up watching TV and movies.
Frustrating.
Friday, June 12, 2009
BC
B.C.
This I remember and despair; His anger never ceases, His wrath never fails; it is kindled every morning.
A.D.
This I remember and therefore I have hope; the Lord's lovingkindness never ceases, His mercies never fail. They are new every morning.
O the riches of the wisdom and grace of God toward me!
This I remember and despair; His anger never ceases, His wrath never fails; it is kindled every morning.
A.D.
This I remember and therefore I have hope; the Lord's lovingkindness never ceases, His mercies never fail. They are new every morning.
O the riches of the wisdom and grace of God toward me!
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Hi, my name is Tim...
We had a group of people form alcoholics anonymous come and speak to the class toay. Very interesting. It was difficult to hear them soeak about themselves in a self depricating way, "I am a drunk"...etc. They said they are an alcoholic today and they just need to get through today and take it a day at a time. They admit their alcohol problem is bigger than themselves and they never take it for granted.
Some interesting observations:
1) They never try to work their way our of reliance and into self-sufficiency.
2) They live every day knowing their weakness and wayward hearts, which keeps them close to their higher power
3) A supportive, honest and confessional communnity is essential, not peripheral, to their success.
I really respected this mindset. I wish we had this a a community of christians. How often I try to work my way out of dependency and burrow into self-reliance. Start with the Spirit, finish with the flesh.
I was wondering what it might look like to incorporate some of these ideas into d team.
Hmmmm....
Some interesting observations:
1) They never try to work their way our of reliance and into self-sufficiency.
2) They live every day knowing their weakness and wayward hearts, which keeps them close to their higher power
3) A supportive, honest and confessional communnity is essential, not peripheral, to their success.
I really respected this mindset. I wish we had this a a community of christians. How often I try to work my way out of dependency and burrow into self-reliance. Start with the Spirit, finish with the flesh.
I was wondering what it might look like to incorporate some of these ideas into d team.
Hmmmm....
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Sign of the Times
The economic duress of the world has reached a devastating tipping point. No doubt, this global recession will usher in an astronomical rise of giant monsters with no one to shoot laser beams at them.
humility of Christ
I have been trying to understand the glory of Christ in His humbling himself. John Owen says it only comes with extended meditation, for which i need an extension. I have had a few thoughts that are meaningful to me. Considering the levels of humility Jesus submitted to. !) He emptied Himself and became a man; the difference between God and man is infinite. Jesus assumed our limitations. Imagine an eternal being submitting to boundaries, circadian rhythms, hunger pains, thirst, suffering and pain, bowel movements... 2) He not only became a man, but a servant of man; poor and homeless. The King came not a prince, but a pauper. 3) He laid down His life to death on a cross; an innocent man being hung as a criminal. This is truly the lowliest man that has ever lived.
Overarching all of these things is the humility of His willingness. His willingness is the most intriguing part. For a man might humble himself under the mighty hand of God to accept a circumstance He cannot control and rely on God given his human condition. But it is entirely another thing for Jesus to willingly submit himself to the limitations of man, the abuse of man, the death on a criminal's cross, when He had it completely within His power to prevent it all. This willingness seems almost foolish. It begs the question WHY?
Why will to do this?
"Behold, I have come to do Your will, O God" Heb 10:7 Because it was the will of God for Jesus to come in this form. Jesus obeyed the infinite will and wisdom of His Father. What Love He has for the Father? What desire to see Him glorified and the infinite worth of His name upheld!
"For God so loved the world that He gave His only son" This is a mystery. Behold what manner of love the Father has given unto us, that we might be called the sons of God!
The humility of Christ to be a mediator for us. Willingly to the dregs. Oh, God, that I would understand more this incredible mystery.
Overarching all of these things is the humility of His willingness. His willingness is the most intriguing part. For a man might humble himself under the mighty hand of God to accept a circumstance He cannot control and rely on God given his human condition. But it is entirely another thing for Jesus to willingly submit himself to the limitations of man, the abuse of man, the death on a criminal's cross, when He had it completely within His power to prevent it all. This willingness seems almost foolish. It begs the question WHY?
Why will to do this?
"Behold, I have come to do Your will, O God" Heb 10:7 Because it was the will of God for Jesus to come in this form. Jesus obeyed the infinite will and wisdom of His Father. What Love He has for the Father? What desire to see Him glorified and the infinite worth of His name upheld!
"For God so loved the world that He gave His only son" This is a mystery. Behold what manner of love the Father has given unto us, that we might be called the sons of God!
The humility of Christ to be a mediator for us. Willingly to the dregs. Oh, God, that I would understand more this incredible mystery.
Thursday, May 28, 2009
freud was right
We were learning about freud's theory the other day. I don't think too many people still practice his psychoanalytic theory, but most people give him creedence just because he was one of the first to take a deeper look into the human conscious.
But as I was considering his theory, I discovered I really agree with the theory. It was all about different parts of the man and the conflict that exists inside them. Freud's theory is a perfect desription of fallen man without God. The Id is the craven fallen nature of man, pursuing his appetites which drives him into all his ambitions and pleasures. This is the remnant of the God-given desire to purue ultimate joy in God, but man chose to serve the reated thing rather than the Creator. Because man was made in the image of God, we have the moral law written on our hearts. We know right and do not do it. This corresponds to the Superego, in a way. Then there is the Ego, the plane of conscious existence we live on most days. It is the mixing pot of the perverted drives for pleasure meet the surrounding world, yet are kept in check by the conscience and the sense of shame that is God given when we wrap our arms around the waists forbidden things.
Some people think he did enough crack to kill a small horse. maybe he did, but I think he was spot on, though he probably didn't know it.
But as I was considering his theory, I discovered I really agree with the theory. It was all about different parts of the man and the conflict that exists inside them. Freud's theory is a perfect desription of fallen man without God. The Id is the craven fallen nature of man, pursuing his appetites which drives him into all his ambitions and pleasures. This is the remnant of the God-given desire to purue ultimate joy in God, but man chose to serve the reated thing rather than the Creator. Because man was made in the image of God, we have the moral law written on our hearts. We know right and do not do it. This corresponds to the Superego, in a way. Then there is the Ego, the plane of conscious existence we live on most days. It is the mixing pot of the perverted drives for pleasure meet the surrounding world, yet are kept in check by the conscience and the sense of shame that is God given when we wrap our arms around the waists forbidden things.
Some people think he did enough crack to kill a small horse. maybe he did, but I think he was spot on, though he probably didn't know it.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Glory of Christ as God's representative
Reading John Owen. God is invisible and completely holy and set apart form us. The Israelites saw him darkened as in a cloud. Although God declared His name to them, "The Lord, the Lord, the great and compassionate God, abounding in mercy and love and truth, forgiving sin and iniquity, yet just and holy to punish sin" they could not see what He was like until Jesus came to show us. Jesus is the only one who could represent God to us and the fact that He actually did despite our darkness and hatred of God - the way He actually did it by dying to show us God's love toward man - is awesome.
Jesus lived out God's name and description of himself. He showed us what it is like to forgive sins, to love the unlovable, what the truth is. He showed mercy to prostitutes and loved the feet of his disciples. He showed that sin will not god unpunished by his disjointed bones and flayed back.
Out of the darkness had shown a great light.
Jesus lived out God's name and description of himself. He showed us what it is like to forgive sins, to love the unlovable, what the truth is. He showed mercy to prostitutes and loved the feet of his disciples. He showed that sin will not god unpunished by his disjointed bones and flayed back.
Out of the darkness had shown a great light.
disease
We were just talking about a;coholism and how it is a disease. I was thinking that calling it a disease would negate accountability for actions. i asked my teacher and she said there is a dopamine malfunction with these people and they seem to be genetically predisposed to cravings and addictions. One is too much and 100 is not enough. initailly i was skeptical about calling alcoholism a disease, but it acts the same way. At one point there is no disease and they are healthy, then they have a precipitous cause, then this cause leads to a disease process or malfunction of normal physiology. Just like a kid with Lupus might have a viral infection which precipitates a systemic pathophysiology of the immune system.
Where does God fit into this? Is alcoholism - a treasuring and valuing of a lesser joy - really a disease which a person cannot help? Maybe our DNA is subject to futility just as our minds are darkened. Perhaps this is an example of God giving a person over to a depraved mind because he worships and serves the created being and not God. Whichever is the case, disease or not, Christ only can redeem from our choices and restore the years the locusts have eaten. Jesus is the answer, i am convinced, to the redemption of all our ills.
Where does God fit into this? Is alcoholism - a treasuring and valuing of a lesser joy - really a disease which a person cannot help? Maybe our DNA is subject to futility just as our minds are darkened. Perhaps this is an example of God giving a person over to a depraved mind because he worships and serves the created being and not God. Whichever is the case, disease or not, Christ only can redeem from our choices and restore the years the locusts have eaten. Jesus is the answer, i am convinced, to the redemption of all our ills.
Monday, May 18, 2009
The glory of Christ
I started readiing John Owen's book "The Glory of Christ" today. It's stunning when a man comes along and rips the rug out under your feet to get your attention. The glory of Christ is the inheritance of the saints, the privledge of the pilgrim here sojourning on these desert drifts. Why spend strength on lesser joys? As I read those words and I feel sudden jerks on my chest, as if God snagged my heart with a hook and is pulling me to the surface. Wake up o sleeper. Wake up soul. Behold the glory of Christ.
Friday, May 15, 2009
Thursday, May 14, 2009
But sanctify Christ in your hearts. Set Him apart in your hearts. As I was thinking about this, another verse came to mind, "Whom have I in heaven but you, and earth has nothing I desire but you." There are other joys in heaven, relationships to kindle, experiences to enjoy, scenery, wonders and old fellowships - yet whom have I in heaven. The psalmists counts them all a loss compared to having God.
Although my heart has many desires, Christ should be sanctified apart from them all. Unparallelled and as if all other desires and pursuits are rubbish.
In the context, don't be afraid of what others will do, rather sanctify Christ in your heart by your hope, then be ready with the backhand because you will be asked the reason for the hope you display.
Although my heart has many desires, Christ should be sanctified apart from them all. Unparallelled and as if all other desires and pursuits are rubbish.
In the context, don't be afraid of what others will do, rather sanctify Christ in your heart by your hope, then be ready with the backhand because you will be asked the reason for the hope you display.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Still
There are those of us who open our own backs with our tongues; we lust to scratch the tickle of blood as it drips. Self-condemnation is a diseased whore we christians frequent; knowing the fungus hurts us, but with a perverted love that we are getting what we deserve.
God so loved the world. This world that loves money and hates him; yet still He loves it. Why, then, do I have a hard time believing He loves me? God loves me.
Borderline spirituality disorder. Invent negative thoughts God must be having about me and live in condemnation because it is just so uncomfortable to be at peace soemtimes.
Be still my soul, for the Love of God has found you.
God so loved the world. This world that loves money and hates him; yet still He loves it. Why, then, do I have a hard time believing He loves me? God loves me.
Borderline spirituality disorder. Invent negative thoughts God must be having about me and live in condemnation because it is just so uncomfortable to be at peace soemtimes.
Be still my soul, for the Love of God has found you.
Monday, May 4, 2009
In class today a group was presenting on JW and how to interact with them professioanlly in the hospital. There was a widespread facade of 'tolerance' and a feeble attempt at understaning, but since most facades are made of wax, they typically melt when a person gets hotheaded. Whispers hopped around the room about how ridiculous it was that these people refuse bloof transfusions and the like. All of this greatly fristrated me, even though I probably disagreed with the JW worldview more than most of them, and I asked, "What if they are right? What criteria do you use to determine whether something is true or not? And if you don't have criteria, on what basis are we calling their beliefs foolish?" It was something like that, I don't know. I just get so angry sometimes about how foolish we are. Everyone's into demolition, but if you ask them how to construct they point to a crumpled pile of discarded blueprints in the corner.
It made me feel like a sojourner. Funny thing is, though, I didn't say anything particularly "christian", just logical. I don't know, you just get the feeling people aren't into talking about stuff like that. But we are all like sheep. Each one has wandered off his own way, looking for gree grass and pasture, not trusting that the Shepherd knows the way. "For we wee continually straying like sheep, but now we have returned to the shepherd and gaurdian of our souls" Im so glad my soul has a gaurdian. One who oversees me, is responsible for feding me, leading me and protecting me. I belong to Him, I am his posession. All of these analogies about sheep makes me wonder, "really? why would anyone act this way for a bunch, let alone one, of dumb sheep?" I guess the same logic could be applied to humans.
It made me feel like a sojourner. Funny thing is, though, I didn't say anything particularly "christian", just logical. I don't know, you just get the feeling people aren't into talking about stuff like that. But we are all like sheep. Each one has wandered off his own way, looking for gree grass and pasture, not trusting that the Shepherd knows the way. "For we wee continually straying like sheep, but now we have returned to the shepherd and gaurdian of our souls" Im so glad my soul has a gaurdian. One who oversees me, is responsible for feding me, leading me and protecting me. I belong to Him, I am his posession. All of these analogies about sheep makes me wonder, "really? why would anyone act this way for a bunch, let alone one, of dumb sheep?" I guess the same logic could be applied to humans.
Friday, May 1, 2009
You get what you pay for
If you call on the Father who judges each man's work impartially, then conduct yourselves with fear during your stay here; because you were not redeemed from the wrath of God with trinkets of gold and silver, but with the precious blood of Christ.
Fear and hope flow from the same fountain: fear prevents us from falling away from hope.
There are no personal considerations with God; He does not receive face or allow backstage access with VIP card. Often I have the frightening reminder that I fall victim to the same ignorant pride of position the Jews in Jesus' day fell for when they said they had Abraham as their father. They rested on laurels and Christians can do the same when we foolishly think we will receive a sideglance wink from God after he warns the others of pride, yet we are somehow exempt on the basis of our sonship.
There is such danger in not reflecting on the price of our redemption. In this verse, understanding the price God paid is the impetus to our living in holy fear.
Fear and hope flow from the same fountain: fear prevents us from falling away from hope.
There are no personal considerations with God; He does not receive face or allow backstage access with VIP card. Often I have the frightening reminder that I fall victim to the same ignorant pride of position the Jews in Jesus' day fell for when they said they had Abraham as their father. They rested on laurels and Christians can do the same when we foolishly think we will receive a sideglance wink from God after he warns the others of pride, yet we are somehow exempt on the basis of our sonship.
There is such danger in not reflecting on the price of our redemption. In this verse, understanding the price God paid is the impetus to our living in holy fear.
Thursday, April 30, 2009
Out damned spot
Jesus, my natural man is enticed by its desires and lusts. The smell of flesh, the feral rush of endorphins with spotted prey, the unchained imagination prowling... one is inclined to agree with Freud. What holds a man back? He denies one dog its meat to feed the other, under the guise of propriety. Damn the civil wickedness. May it not be said of this man that his own hand stayed the pulsing demand of his desires; only to feed the animal in the secret dark what was denied in the open day. May this man be mastered by a Spirit. May they not stay. God, forbid they stay.
on the line
The problem being a leader is the people behind you are the first to see when you mess your shorts. I came to realize today that I have failed in my stewardship of the dteam. I have not given clear direction to them as to what we are doing here, what are our norms, and just keeping us in a tighter community. Thisis indicative of my own heart, firstly. Recently I have been complacent and settled in lesser joys. Neglecting my salvation and handling my time poorly. Today I lay in bed really doubting if anyone's life is really changed by the hoy spirit. Its been a tough year. I think I spend most of my time trying to salvage wreckage from my self. Amidst the flotsam I try to stay afloat on any debris with my image on it. I end of swimming harder to keep it above water.
The mercy in this mourning is found in Christ's extended hand, settling me atop the glassy sea. The cross. By it I have the right to be called a child of God. The right. Imagine that. That is how certain the atonement of Christ is - I don't slip in and stand in the corner, I don't hang my head in shame or hide my nametag, I boldly declare my right to be a child of God through. God places his signet ring on my finger and says if anyone takes issue with my declaration, they take issue with Him. He has decalred it, it is mine, by right, through the blood of Jesus Christ.
Praise.
The mercy in this mourning is found in Christ's extended hand, settling me atop the glassy sea. The cross. By it I have the right to be called a child of God. The right. Imagine that. That is how certain the atonement of Christ is - I don't slip in and stand in the corner, I don't hang my head in shame or hide my nametag, I boldly declare my right to be a child of God through. God places his signet ring on my finger and says if anyone takes issue with my declaration, they take issue with Him. He has decalred it, it is mine, by right, through the blood of Jesus Christ.
Praise.
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